


You

by orphan_account



Series: Lamp City [2]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Futurefic, M/M, Post Season 6, anxiety attack, bipolar, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-20 03:18:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7388416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"And that I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart<br/>You put up with a lot it was a problem from the start<br/>And even if you took me back it wouldn't be the same<br/>I'll even get a tattoo for you of your name<br/>And you know I never meant to be an asshole<br/>I guess it's greener where the other people's grass grows...."- "You" by Cam Meekins</p>
<p>"You changed me, Gallagher. You went into my head and created a new Mickey fuckin' Milkovich."</p>
            </blockquote>





	You

**Author's Note:**

> Sequel to "Inhale, Exhale."

"Would you like to sit?"

Ian speaks these words with an almost nervous twitch. He looks like he almost regrets speaking. Neither man knows quite what to do.

"Yeah, let's..." heart racing "let's...." sudden overwhelming fear "let's sit down."

They do just that; now here they are, three years after that fateful day, sitting by themselves in a café, unsure of how even to speak to each other. Mickey is just looking into Ian's green eyes. Ian closes his eyes and sighs, rubbing his forehead.

"You know, Mick..." He begins, looking back up at Mickey, choosing his words carefully. "I messed up. The medicine doesn't.... doesn't completely stop it." He pauses. Mickey can tell Ian's struggling. "I'm still bipolar. I'll have the disorder forever. Some days are harder than others. But I can manage it. I have managed it. I'm better than I've been in years."

Ian takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. Mickey is caught on every word from Ian's mouth; he isn't sure exactly how to react. All he can do is listen silently.

"I wasn't in a good state of mind, when I did what I did. I'd been around Monica too much, I let her mess with my head. I regret that. So much. I did wrong by you, Mick. I want to fix it, in any way possible. I'm sorry, Mick."

Mickey feels the air change; is he getting goosebumps? How many times had Mickey dreamed of those words leaving Ian's mouth. Mickey can't think of anything to say, yet he starts talking, on autopilot, not quite comprehending the words leaving his own mouth.

"Were there other guys? Did you.... did you date anyone else?" Mickey can't look into Ian's eyes at this point. He can only stare down at the table top, red and spotless.

"Yes."

Mickey swears he feels a little chest pain. 

"Was he good to you?"

"Yeah he was. Caleb was a really great guy. But... I just couldn't last. I tried to ignore that nagging feeling in the back of my head. We broke up after a few good months. I just couldn't take the regret I felt." 

Mickey brings his blue eyes up to look at Ian's green. 

"I was a wreck, you know. The one time you visited.... I put on an appearance. I tried to act like I wasn't shattered. Can you imagine, being in prison, crying? Can you fuckin' imagine the fear? You changed me, Gallagher. You went into my head and created a new Mickey fuckin' Milkovich. And I was fine with it. I loved you." loved. Past tense. Ian winces, a slight movement but so so noticeable now to Mickey. "Then you did...." heart palpitations. So it was an anxiety attack. "You did what you did. And now your comin' into my life again, just like that, trying to change me some more?"

Ian's eyes widened slightly, and his skin suddenly became flushed. 

"You know.... you know I'll come back to you. You know I'll say yes no matter what. I love you too much to not." Mickey knows what he's saying right now; but his voice is different. There's an unidentifiable weakness, a vulnerability to it that wasn't there before. "So just promise me. And mean it this time. Promise me that you won't ruin me like that again. Just promise that this is for real." Ian looks like he's about to cry. He's staring so deeply into Mickey's eyes.

"I do. I promise. I love you, Mick." 

Mickey lets out a breath.

It was a breath he'd been holding for three years.


End file.
